19.8.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [19-8-17]


Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks
  • Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants.
  • My kid beat up your honor student.
  • Don't make me get out my flying monkeys!
  • It is as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
  • It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.

13.8.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [13-8-17]


Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks  
  • I'd like to see a nature film where an eagle swoops down and pulls a fish out of a lake, and then maybe he's flying along, low to the ground, and the fish pulls a worm out of the ground. Now that's a documentary.
  • It's all fun and games, 'till someone loses an eye! Then it's a *SPORT*
  • If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button
  • Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population
  • After any salary raise, you will have less money at the end of the month than you did before
  

10.8.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [10-8-17]


Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks   
  • I admit that my wife is outspoken, but by whom?
  • Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving
  • If at first you don't succeed ... well, so much for sky diving
  • The speed of time is one-second per second
  • If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go, because, man, they're gone
 

7.8.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [7-8-17]

  
Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks   
  • The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a leaky tire
  • I'm Out Of Bed And Dressed; What More Do You Want?
  • Virus check complete. All viruses functioning normally
  • If I was the head of a country that lost a war, and I had to sign a peace treaty, just as I was signing, I'd glance over the treaty and then suddenly act surprised. "Wait a minute! I thought we won!"
  • The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate, is called a grandparent
 

4.8.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [4-8-17]


Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks
  • I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life. 
  • All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets
  • I don't suffer from stress. I am a carrier!!!
  • It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others
  • Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any
 

1.8.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [1-8-17]

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks
  • Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after
  • If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.
  • Keep working! Millions on welfare are depending on you!
  • I don't suffer from stress. I'm a carrier.
  • Wait...I'm trying to imagine you with a personality
 

22.7.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [22-7-17]


Cool Remarks 
  • Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused
  • The more people I meet, the more I like my dog
  • Seriousness is when stupidity gratuates college...
  • I seem to have lost my phone number, can I have yours?
  • Is it possible to be totally partial?

15.7.17

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks [15-7-17]

Bumper Stickers & Cool Remarks
  • Join M.A.D. - Mothers Against Dyslexia
  • Consciousness: That annoying time between naps
  • Conscience is what hurts when everything else feels so good
  • The trouble with work is-it's so daily
  • Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear